Seeking Mental Health Support from Friends and Family: A First Aid Guide

We all face moments of emotional turbulence and stress.

Just as we would reach out for physical first aid in times of injury or illness, it's essential to recognize the importance of seeking mental health support when needed.

Your friends and family can be valuable allies in this regard. No matter how big or how small your concerns may be, seeking help can lesson the impact.

Professional help can be even more beneficial, but also can be more difficult to get started. Social stigmas around mental health often prevent those in need from seeking professional assistance. The cost of such services can also be prohibitive.

In this article, we'll explore how to ask for mental health support from your loved ones.

Recognize the Need

Before you can ask for help, you need to be able to recognize when you need it.

Mental health concerns can manifest in various ways, including:

  • Feelings of sadness
  • Anxiety
  • Irritability
  • Rage
  • Nervousness
  • Withdrawal
  • Lack of interest in things that previously brought joy
  • Headaches
  • Trouble sleeping
  • Dramatic appetite change
  • Less ability to think or function clearly
  • Apathy

Acknowledge your emotions and trust your instincts; if something doesn't feel right, it's okay to seek help.


Take some time to reflect on what you're experiencing. As difficult as it is, try to witness your thoughts, feelings, and actions without judgement.

Acknowledge the changes in yourself, but don’t shame yourself for them.

Try to identify the specific thoughts, feelings, or situations that are causing distress.

Understanding your feelings better can help you articulate your needs to your friends and family.

Choose the Right Time and Place

Selecting the right time and setting for this conversation is essential.

Find a quiet, comfortable, and private space where you won't be interrupted.

Avoid discussing sensitive topics in the midst of a heated argument or when you or your loved ones are already stressed.

Remember that it is ok for the other person to refuse to help in the moment. Respect their time, energy, and own mental health. If they cannot help you immediately when you ask, try not to get too disappointed or angry. Instead, see if you can arrange a time that better suits you both.

If the other person responds by saying that they themselves have been feeling overwhelmed or down lately, perhaps you could reciprocate help. Listen and support each other, without trying to one-up each other or dominate the situation.

Be Open and Honest

When reaching out for mental health support, honesty is the best policy.

Express your feelings and concerns openly and honestly.

You can say something like, "I've been feeling really overwhelmed lately, and I could use some support."

Vague statements can be frustrating for the other person, and aren’t likely to get you the support you want and need. This can be difficult to achieve if you haven’t adequately identified your own thoughts and feelings.

Use "I" Statements

Frame your requests using "I" statements, which can make the conversation less confrontational and more about your feelings.

For example, say, "I've been struggling with my anxiety," instead of "You make me anxious."

Be Specific

Clearly communicate what you need from your friends or family.

Whether it's a listening ear, emotional support, or practical assistance, let them know how they can help.

You can choose whether or not you want to receive advice or if you want help ‘fixing’ a situation. Sometimes you just need someone to listen, not to fix.

Specific requests are easier for loved ones to respond to effectively.

Share Resources

Let your friends and family know that you're actively seeking help for your mental health.

Share information about therapists, counsellors, support groups, or helplines that you're considering.

This shows that you are taking steps to address your concerns and allows them to support you in this process.

Take on board suggestions of resources that they may have. You never know what they themselves are going through, and what resources they’ve sought out that you may not know about.

Be Patient

Remember that your loved ones may not fully understand what you're going through or know how to respond immediately.

Be patient and give them time to process your request for mental health support.

Encourage open communication and ask if they have any questions or concerns.

Offer Reassurance

Assure your loved ones that you value their support and that your request is not a burden.

Let them know that you appreciate their willingness to help you during this challenging time.

Follow Up

After the initial conversation, it's essential to follow up with your friends and family.

Share your progress and let them know how their support has been beneficial.

Continue to keep the lines of communication open, and don't hesitate to seek professional help if necessary.


Asking for mental health support from friends and family is an essential aspect of self-care.

Remember that reaching out for help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

By approaching the conversation with honesty, openness, and a willingness to communicate, you can build a strong support system that aids in your mental health journey.

Your loved ones are there for you, ready to provide the first aid your mind may need.

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